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Licensed to Spill...

Just before he stopped driving at 92 and having been a driver for over 7 decades, he had an accident damaging a man's fence. He received his first ever ticket. At the scene he offered to write a check to the property owner for the damages. The cop told him he would not have written the ticket if he knew he was going to pay the damages. The ticket was basically to assign fault for liability


 Not Sue Happy...

He once fell at Capt D's and seriously injured his leg. There was liability on Capt D's due to a seriously neglected problem with the sidewalk, but Ralph did not believe in lawsuits. Even after Captain D's didn't immediately correct the dangerous situation which caused the fall and subsequent injuries.


 He really sucks...

The roof over Ralph's carport and Florida room has a problem with rain water collection. Ralph built a contraption which allowed him to siphon the standing water after each rain. He ran a vinyl hose onto the roof and into the low spot. After heavy rain he would would actually go out and suck on the hose to get the water flowing from the roof and into the drainage gutter he provided.  


 Cell Phone Pioneer...

He once walked to our house a few doors down from his while carrying his cordless phone. He said he got to the corner of the street about a hundred feet from his house before losing the signal. He was so amazed with the cordless phone. Why did it take him so long to get a cell phone???


The IRS in Him...

Ralph used to take daily walks. I don't know the distance, but I'm sure he knew. He could tell you exactly how much money he found on his strolls as he would record it in the notebook he kept in his shirt pocket and totaled it annually. I don't know if he reported as income on his taxes so don't repeat this story:) 


It Takes a Thief

After his house was broken into, we offered to give him some Safetouch alarm stickers to display on his windows. We though it would deter further break-ins. His response... That is like stealing from Safetouch and he declined the stickers opting instead to leave a few notes in his house. One read "There is no money in this safe. Only family papers. Please believe me." Of course there were only personal papers in the safe because he would not lie about it. Another note read " Sorry, you are too late. Somebody already got six guns from this cabinet." It is truly a shame that he lived to see the day when someone would steal from an honorable 90 year old man.



Never Give Up

While in the hospital only days before passing, he was being moved from his bed to a chair at his request (more like demand). The nurse bumped his head on the bed's rail when she was trying to lift him out. His eyes rolled to the back of his head then closed and he went limp. The nurse began to panic and was asking for assistance when he opened his eyes and fired up his big smile. He said gotcha in a soft voice which was about all he had left after a month of intermittent intubation. The nurse was first relieved then amused. He kept all the nurses amused when he was conscious and communicable. He made lots of new friends in his last month while staying at the hospital. BTW, they ended up using a harness and electric hoist to get him out of the bed. He seemed to enjoy the ride.

These are only a few of the stories I know. There are many people with many stories and I would love to add them to spice it up a little.


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